I have a cough.
I’ve had it for 5 days.
There is no end in sight.
I’m almost desperate enough to take drastic measures like sticking a vacuum hose in my mouth to try to suck out the ... flegm … (flegm? flem? phlegm?) … mucus.
It sounds like a shotgun is going off in my cubicle every time the tickle in my throat gets unbearable.
I brought some cookies to work as a peace offering on Monday, but I have a feeling my coworkers are currently plotting my demise. I’m sure it involves a strobe light, water torture and seasons 1 through 3 of Barney and Friends.
Help me.
6 comments:
I’m almost desperate enough to take drastic measures and go to the doctor.
FIFY!
Get to the doc! What are you waiting for? No need to torture yourself... or your neighbors/family. We have technology these days that will heal you completely. And probably pretty fast, too. Wishing you a speedy recovery!
I hate phlegm and mucous. They have drugs for that.
I hate Barney. You'd better get well.
I called the cops. They'll be there shortly.
After they figure out what your last name is. I just told them your first.
Post a Comment