You may ask, "Nathan, what is the perfect gift for someone turning 30?"
Well, I can't answer that.
Instead, I can tell you what I got.
For the purposes of scientific analysis, I will divide the gifts into groups.
Good: Lots of chocolate, slacks and a dress shirt
Mildly Inappropriate (but still hilarious): Prunes and Depends for Women (because I get "ma'am-ed" all the time)
The last ones were given to me by my neighbors. He gave me the prunes and she gave me the Depends. She used to be my boss when I was a student, and I have to admit that I gave her the same package of Depends when she turned 40.
So, if anyone invites me to a white elephant gift exchange in the near future, you'll probably be able to guess what's lurking in the shiny, wrapped box under my arm.