Thursday, October 30, 2008

I feel old ...

First, a little context. I'm in my 20s. Granted, it's my late 20s, but I'm still there.

Those who are older, are probably exasperated by the title of this post, saying, "If you think you're old now, just wait until you're [insert larger number here]!"

My point is not in the number but in the distance I have now moved from all that is young, hip and cool.

I was never cool, as you're probably starting to realize from my previous posts. In high school, my only claim to fame was that I looked remarkably like the AP History teacher. Thankfully, he was a popular teacher, but not because he was cool. He was that nerdy, funny guy that everyone laughs at/with (but more at).
(End Tangent)

Not only do I groan involuntarily when I have to heave myself out of a chair, but I realize I'm completely out of touch with my teenage nieces and nephews. All this texting and MP3 players and the return of 80s fashion choices is making my head spin a little bit. If I remember correctly, we all came out of the hairspray fog of the 80s and realized what a mistake everyone made with stirrup pants and shoulder pads when they were exposed to the harsh light of day and the heavy handed critique of common sense.

Now, these things are returning combined with a fresh load of crud I don't understand, and it makes me want to go hide under my bed and hide.

So ... yeah. I feel old. Old and crotchety. Someone had better come by soon to give me my medicine. I don't know if I can read the giant letters on this weekly pill organizer.

... and I may need one of those Life Alert buttons.

I bet you never thought there could be two of these in one post, did you?

It doesn't help matters that I already have a ton of gray hair. It started in high school and the three I had back then have started breeding like rabbits.

In an odd way, this is actually a good thing. Since I have the face of a 12 year old and 99% of telemarketers call me ma'am (I'm still waiting for my voice to change), at least I'm getting something to put a little age on me.
(End Tangent)


Shorty said...

Great post! Thanks for making me laugh out loud!

JMadd said...

I have to say "Bravo!" for freely admitting that you're out of touch. I'm not quite out of touch, but I attribute that to MTV, VH1, the CW, and "If I were Really Skinny." My husband, on the other hand, is so out of touch that he actually thinks his mock turtlenecks and tapered jeans will come back. I gave them to charity while he wasn't looking. Leggings, flourescent colors, and colored denim may have creeped their way back into the mainstream, but tapered jeans and mock turtlenecks for men will never come back! I will see to it.

As for feeling 'old," I think it starts at about 26. That's when I had to start using anti-wrinkle cream and coloring my hair, plus taking NSAIDs for my bum hip. I swear it hurts every time it's about to rain.