Sunday, February 1, 2009

Slow Learner

I've never claimed to be quick on the uptake. Sometimes it just takes me an extra minute to process things before I can come to a conclusion (especially in elementary school when I had to figure out that crazy thing called multiplication).

Compound this with the fact that I tend to repeat my mistakes and you have the recipe for an interesting life.

My earliest example of this is when I was 2 or 3 years old. For some odd reason I had this morbid fascination with the electric burners on the top of our stove. I loved watching them get all orange and glowy. (I think I just made up a new word.)

Now, I don't have very clear memories of this, but evidently, I thought the only thing cooler than looking at them was to touch them. No less than three times, I stuck BOTH hands on the burners. I guess the days afterward spent with my hands wrapped in washcloths stuffed in bags of ice didn't teach me anything the first two times. Thankfully after the third, I wised up and stopped.

The upside? With all that fingertip charring, I might not have any fingerprints left, so crime spree here I come!

(Just kidding. I don't have the guts ... and it's wrong.)


krystal said...

Just so you know, I will blame you if our daughter ever does that.

Rachel said...

One time I spent the night on Univ Ave to save seats for the 4th of July parade. Around 3 a.m. my friend was handing out these huge sparklers and everyone was waving them around. I had the thought that I MUST know what it feels like, so I grabbed the recently covered in flames metal. Bad idea. Of course, that night I had a seizure.