Growing up, there seemed to be a school or church dance every weekend. In truth, there was probably one of each per year, but those few dances were enough to scar me into feeling like high school was my own personal dancing version of Groundhog Day.
Aside from feeling like a complete moron every time I had to move to a rhythm, I was already lurpy enough to stand out in any crowd.
To this day, whenever I hear dance music, each of the vertebrae in my back temporarily fuse together. It's like having a broomstick for a spine. You can imagine the cool moves I can do when that happens.
Does anyone want to help me name this newly discovered medical condition?
There might just be a plate of cookies in it for you.
Thankfully, now I know I'm not alone. Here is another Matt Koval video to illustrate.