Monday, December 29, 2008

Vocab Super Powers

When I was little, I always wanted to have a super power or two. I REALLY wanted to fly or teleport, but I would have settled for running fast or super strength or shooting fireballs out of my hands.

Imagine my disappointment when every birthday wish went unfulfilled. I even made sure not to tell anyone, in case that would jinx it. Still, no matter how many times I asked for some kind of ability, I woke up the next day depressingly normal.

However, looking back I might have had a super power and not even known about it. This is in addition to my other, previously exposed super power. Granted, it's nothing cool like you see in the comic books, but I had a HUGE vocabulary.

(Tangent)
I say "had" because I think after reaching my peak in childhood, I just coasted through high school and landed pretty much where everyone else is.
(End Tangent)

You want some evidence? You won't just take my claim at face value?

Here's an example from when I was 4 or 5 years old:

My mom and I were heading into church. She always said I should have been born with a briefcase, and I typically talked to the adults around me about as easily as the kids. We were just about to reach the outer door, and I turned to my mom and said, "Mom, did you bring your brush?" She was a little surprised, and replied, "I did. Why do you need it?" That's when I (dressed in my little blazer, white shirt and tie) put a hand to the back of my head and said, "I need to make an adjustment."

My mom loves this story because she says it's indicative of how often she thought I was quotable.

(Tangent)
Incidentally, needing to make an "adjustment" was all too common. I have three ... count them ... three cowlicks on the back of my head. Two of them are right next to each other, and until I discovered the miracles of gel and pomade, I'd get a pretty awesome Alfalfa going each day. It used to bug me terribly, and at one point I even took scissors and chopped off the whole offending section. All this did was make it worse until it could grow back out. Thankfully, my daughter only has one cowlick. I checked. I also checked for some of my other minor deformities, and I think she got away without any of them.
(End Tangent)

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